DO YOU FEEL LUCKY?

JULY 9, 1999

How often do you find yourself in a place of chaos, confusion, and/or uncertainty? Recall times in your life when you felt as if the weight of the world was on your shoulders and the times when you contemplated whether of not it is worth moving onwards. Signs that you may be in this state of mind may be a mind that is constantly racing, your body is tense, your jaw feels tighter than a brand new jar that you struggle to open, or maybe when you just feel like closing your eyes an escaping for a while. Whatever the case may be, someone or something has taken you out of the moment. It is my belief that you and only you have taken yourself out of the moment. Think about that for a second or two.

Now, while we are talking about being taken out of the moment, let me tell you a brief story about an interaction Pat and I had with a middle-aged chapjust the other day in Woking, Surrey which is in England. While eating dinner, Pat made a comment to this man, named Gary, who was enjoying his meal at the table right next to us. I must thank my wife for initiating this conversation because what happened after that was truly healing on all levels, for all of us. Gary began sharing stories with us which I am sure he has not revealed to often. His stories indicated that he has surrounded himself with individuals who have intense physical and emotional challenges.
He began to tell us about his sister, confined to a wheelchair, who was going to face some major obstacles in attending a fast approaching wedding which Gary was organizing for his daughter. Are you following me or have I lost you yet? It appears that the church is not accessible and a bathroom equipped for a wheelchair is nowhere to be found. Our friend explained that he felt as if his hands were tied and he had no control over the situation. How do you feel when you can't control a situation? Can you relate to our friend Gary?

Gary continued with his stories and mentioned his son's best friend who happens to be blind. He actually has been blind since birth. Can you imagine never being able to view anything that this wonderful world has to offer? Just thinking about that makes me appreciate my life even more. Anyway, while discussing his son's friend, Gary is consumed by a huge smile that overcomes his face. You can tell how inspired he is by this young chap and how thankful he is that his son has such a solid friendship with this boy. Gary proceeded to tell us that the boy could feel the color orange Yes, I mean feel orange. Orange feels warm to him and the color green
represents a feeling of freshness. The boy's parents explained the association of colors to feelings, but until he began to feel his own experiences, everything else was just words. Talking about this boy was very emotional for Gary. He felt so fortunate to have this boy in his life. He felt even more blessed to have a son who learned to read braille at the age of fourteen so that he could communicate with his friend. Can you imagine learning to read braille at the awkward, selfish, and young age of fourteen? The work involved, even if it was to help someone, would have eluded me at that age. I told Gary how incredible a father he is and how his son is simply a "spitting image" of him. Then I proceeded to discuss with him the need to examine all of these individuals with extensive physical and emotional problems who surrounded him in his life. I posed the
question, "Why do you continue to bring all of these people into your space and what is the lesson you are yearning to learn from these encounters?" He was silent.

The story continues. Gary then informed us of a colleague whose son is schizophrenic. Our friend was deeply concerned about the father who emotionally could not cope with his son's condition. Once again Gary was seeking to grasp some control over the situation. It was another unsuccessful attempt. "Why?" you may ask. His intention to help is being weighted down by his need to control. It is that easy, yet tedious to release and fully understand. Does this scenario sound familiar? Gary is an extraordinary human being who appeared to be trapped in a state of confusion and uncertainty. It is a positive state of confusion because he is aware of it. Awareness is a critical element to acceptance and ultimately release. Why do all these physical and emotional challenges or issues surround him I the forms of other people, now including myself as we are face to face discussing this matter? And why does this affect him so deeply, always? Yes, it is natural to be affected by something or someone out of the ordinary. I always ask myself, "What is ordinary and what is normal?" Anyway, in this case it is a physical opportunity. But after the initial "processing," why do people and/or circumstances linger within us in ways which energetically deplete us? Answer, because we have yet to own and make peace with these aspects of ourselves. We'll talk more about your shadow side in a later story. In all reality, when we see someone who looks different than we are, which is practically everyone, we sometimes pass judgement in the form of, "I can't ever imagine being that way!" Do those words sound familiar? Sometimes we are actually shocked or totally depressed we when encounter or view someone or something out of our own reality. Does that mean it is wrong, disgusting, or even unacceptable? Of course not. Only to you it appears that way because you have yet to own that aspect of yourself. You
may say that many people feel that way. My response to that is the heck with everyone else. Be responsible for yourself and let others do the same. Remember, you can only control you...and that is not always a given either! 

Try to imagine this. Here you are, driving your car and suddenly you are hit blind-sided by a vehicle traveling at 60 MPH, sending your car into the median, and having your car turned into an accordion. Could you see how your body could be totally transformed or shall I say deformed? It's a frightening thought, but it could happen. And what if you were born into this world with no eyesight, like Gary's friend, or born with no ability to hear, or born with no feet. Gary reminded me of an old saying, "I thought I was poor until I saw a man without any shoes. Then I saw a man without any feet." Yes, you can count your blessings for what you do have and you can
also accept the things you could have. In other words, ask yourself, "What would it take for me to accept another person or circumstance, no matter how far out of my own reality it may appear to be?" Try to create a story about how this could be you or happen to you and I am confident that you will move closer to a place of acceptance. Finally, Gary concluded our inspiring evening by asking me if I feel lucky. 

I had just told Pat earlier in the day how lucky I am to be with the one I love, traveling around the world for a second time, and making a difference in the lives of others. Whenever your mind is racing, the weight of the world appears to be on your shoulders (trust me, it's not!), depressed, stressed, or any place other than love and appreciation, ask yourself, "Do I feel lucky?" or "For what am I grateful?" The gift of life is a good beginning wouldn't you say? I'm confident that you will find more gifts in your life which will always bring you back to this precious moment. Thanks Gary for inspiring me and thank you all for listening!!

Scott.

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